In the past year sleep has been a luxury and not a given, as our youngest apparently feels that sleep is overrated. I have inhaled coffee as the only way to keep me standing upright. During this time I have been more stressed and moody. And I haven't been getting as much out into the world as I wanted to. By habit doing nothing didn't seem like the best cure for the above. Thursday my partner told me to go away for 3 days, sleep, relax and do what I felt was most called for - wow, uhmmmm are you sure, really, ok see you Sunday. I am lucky in the man department I must say.

Out the door I went and took the train to my sisters. Of course I took some work with me thinking this time away would be productive... HA!

At my sisters I had a cup of coffee and didn't really like the brew she was cooking up, so I drank some tea instead. I left the coffee for the next 3 days. This being the first break from the black liquid in over a year. Friday morning I was so tired all I could do was lay on the couch - I stayed there until Saturday midday only to return a few hours later.

I couldn't believe how tired I was and being honest with myself I knew I had been for a really long time. Work, kids, life, habit got to me and I didn't really "hear" the need for more sleep.

I normally listen to my body and respect my limits. I also know that I love cuddling up in the evenings a little late, I don't like sleeping during the day and I have so many ideas and love my work that it is hard for me to leave it be.

I am however even more aware that to keep it all up I need to respect my bodies limits and not drown it in caffeine. In the end it wasn't offering a positive contribution to my life.

And as I dive into the material for the upcoming HEAR*SEE*HOLD course I deepen that listening. As with most areas of self and life there is always more to be discovered. The coffee overpowered what my body needed, and in my case boy did I need to sleep, relaxation and to do absolutely nothing.

I came back with a few lessons learned:

1. I don't like filtered coffee

2. Sleeping on a couch for 24 hours ain't too good on the back

3. That I too have blind spots

4. Ignoring it doesn't make it go away

5. zzzzz zzzzz zzzzz